One Monday in October...

Not just any Monday, but the day my first child was to come into the world. Yes, it was on Monday the 21st. day of 1974 that Jennifer Marie was born. I remember vividly that morning. My sister and Mom were going about their normal routine. They were getting ready to go preaching. I was still in bed when Janet cried out that her water bag had broken. We called my mother down by us and before you knew it, we were on our drive to St. Mary's hospital in the north side of the city. We lived in the southwest side at that time.

Well, there we were at the hospital. Jan was admitted since there was no doubt she would have the baby on that day. My mother and sister waited for a while and then they left. I stay, of course. After a couple of hours the Doctor came and told me that there was a problem. I still recall the sinking sick feeling that came over me. Was my wife, my girl who I loved so very much, in danger. Was she going to die? Was our unborn child in danger? Was I going to lose one or both of them? All these thoughts ran through my head at 100 miles and hour. I did not want to lose either one of them, but I felt so small, not knowing what to do. The Doctor then proceeded to tell me what the issue was. Jan was not dialating properly, hope I spelled that word correctly. Anyway, if things did not improve soon, then Jan would need a "C-section". Boy was I scared! Jan was also, as you could imagine, very frightened. We loved each other and we wanted to be together, and we wanted our baby to be born ok. Well, it seemed like time was standing still while at the same time everything was happening so quickly.

Well, the dreaded moment came. The Doctor came and told me that they could not wait any longer without placing the baby in danger. So, I signed the papers so that they could perform surgery. I tried to keep a calm look for Jan's sake, but we knew each other so well, she knew how I felt.

It seemed like an eternity and all those crazy thoughts ran through my mind over and over. Finally, I was told that my baby was born. She was a girl. I was so happy but still worried since I had no info on Janet's condition yet. I soon heard she was fine. of coursse she would need to go to recovery. I remembered the Nuns rolling my little girl to the nursery. I wanted to hold her so bad, but rules were much different back then. I could not even be in the same room until much later.

We named her Jennifer, after the girl in the movie love story. All my prayers to God had been answered. Not only did I get to keep Jan in my life, but now we had a daughter. She was as beautiful as her mom and they shared the same green color in their eyes. They were the greatest things to happen to me in my youth....

Today's weather...

Rain, wind and cold. How I remember as a child waiting for the bus on a corner in weather like today's. As you may already know, there were no bus stop shelters. The most you could hope for was a phone booth with all the glass still in place. Store owners were not likely to allow folks to wait inside unless they were actively shoppin. I recall going to the store with my mom and just thinking of the moment the bus would arrive and we could get warm, and a little dry. This was the way it was back then. I am sure that for some today who do not own a car the situation is similar.

Getting home was great. I would get out of my wet clothes and stand by the floor vent to warm up. Getting home and feeling safe made it all worth it.

You know that as I think of it all, such times help you to appreciate how far we have come and how much further we can still go....

Hatitude....

Think I am kidding? Go to Google, or any search engine, and type in hatitude. It is here to stay! I am sure for some people it has always existed, but it is now being embraced by many.

What is it? Well, it is something different for each individual. It applies to both men and women. Some adorn a favorite dress, outfit or suit with a certain hat. Others just wear any hat cause it makes them feel good about themselves. Some may want to copy the past hat weare's, such as Sinatra, Bogart and the Mob. Others of us, however, enjoy the mystic feeling which comes with owning and wearing a vintage hat. When I put on my fedoras I wonder where each one has been If they could talk what a story they would tell. I also wonder how proud the original owner was when he bought and wore this particular fedora. For some of my hats I do know a little about their past, but for the majority, I just know the age of the hat. One of my latest finds is a black Richmond Brothers fedora which was purchased in 1954 by a lady for her husband. This hat came with a red feather, which it still has, and the husband felt it was to loud. So he left it in the box and never wore it. There daughter was cleanig up after the mom died and she came across the hat, She asked her father if he still wanted it and he said she could have it. She did some research and found it to be vintage so she put it up for auction on EBAY. I won that auction. She sent me the hat and it's original box which still had the tissue paper inside. I gave the box to my dad with a different hat inside. You may think that anyone can come up with a story to sell something, and I agree. However you cannot put the gold lettering inside the hat or the year on the box. Oh yeah i ALSO got the original price tag inside the hat. i don't consider myself a collector, I just enjoy owning and wearing my old hats. It is my hobby.

While I do have hatitude, I won't wear a fedora which has a brim larger than 2'. All my fedoras have a brim of 2'' or less. I guess just how that man felt out of place with the red feather, I feel the same about wide brims.

Hatitude, yes i HAVE IT AND i INTEND TO WEAR IT PROUDLY. wHEN THE GLAMOUR AND FAD WEAR OFF FROM ALL THOSE WHO HAVE JUMPED ON THE BAND WAGON OF WEARING FEDORAS, THOSE OF US WHO WEAR THEM FOR THE WAY THEY MAKE US FEEL ABOUT OURSELVES, WILL CONTINUE TO WEAR THEM WITH HATITUDE....

Do times change or do we?

As the years go by, I notice many changes in my life. No, not so much regarding my physical make-up, but rather my mental and emotional being.

So, have times changed or have I? I think times have changed because I have changed. If I still felt, thought and acted the same as I always had in the past, well then times would also be the same. It would be as a routine. Is change good? Well, that depends if your change makes you a better person or not. It would be easy for me to say that my changes have been for the best, but that is my opinion and yours may differ. It would be nice if we could always make changes which improve us as a person, but that is not always the case. Many times people make changes only to find it was the wrong choice. Choice, that is what it comes down to, what we choose to do or not do. Many won't make changes because they are afraid to make the wrong choice. How will you ever know if you just sit there and do nothing? Of course one needs to analyze ones reasons for wanting to change and research the options carefully, thereby minimizing the chace of failure.

Are any changes really needed? That is a question only one can answer. In my case I felt that definite changes were needed. Don't confuse well thought out changes with those forced upon us by the actions or inactions of others. Those changes come about without much of our input or preparation. But, even those can be good if we have the right attitude and don't allow them to ruin us. You see, we can't control what others do, but we can and must control how we deal with the situation.

What I have found interesting and enjoyable about this whole thing we call life, is the fact that we are never too old to change. We are never too old to improve ourselves and our outlook. What the hell, we are here so why not make the best of it...and enjoy the ride!.

Well, I guess it's not a fad...

I often wonder how many people in the world are like me. No, not in every aspect, just in some. For example, ever since I was a child I would have these times where my focus was on one thing, and that one thing, whatever it may have been, would take up most of my time and effort. After a while, with few exceptions, I would reach a point where I was no longer interested in that item, event or whatever. I guess some would call it a fad, while others might call it A.D.D. Well, I don't want to label myself as that, but I have been known to loose interest quickly. My mind is always moving, I am always thinking. There is not one moment in my day where I am just blank. Are all people this way? Or are some people able to empty their minds of all thought? That is rather scary to me, just the thought of not having anything on your mind. I guess some who practice yoga are able to do this. Is it better to always be thinking or not? I don't know, since I have never been able to do so.

Anyway, I kind of got off track. I was originally going to right about how I am still very much involved in purchasing, wearing and learning about vintage fedoras. I was at one point wondering if this also would become one of those things I lost interest in. Well, it is going on 2 years now, so I think this qualifies as a keeper, not a fad. I think, there I go again, it is because it was something I always wanted to do, that is, own a quality fedora. I would as a child see older gentlemen, such as my grandfathers, wear nice hats. As a kid I always wore baseball caps and newsboy caps, but my longing was always for a fedora. I was too young for one, or so I thought. I have through my research found that fedoras wher also worn by young men at one time in history. Ok, maybe not a kid, but a young man.. Well, better late than never. I am now a proud owner of 20 vintage fedoras which I wear proudly. I actually own 26 fedoras, but I don't count my straw fedoras as vintage because they are not. I among does straw fedoras, own 2 Panama hats from Ecuador which I thought I would like when I originally ordered them, but I really was dissappointed in them. I guess for some they are fine, but I find that the brim is way to big. I don't like fedoras with brims longer than 2 1/4'', actually under 2'' is more my style. I have learned a lot about fedoras and their history. I own fedoras as old as 65 years old. I often wonder, if these fedoras could talk, what a story they could tell. Not only are my fedoras vintage, they also come from all over the U>S.A. and I also own two fedoras which were made in Italy and made it to the U.S.

So, You see, I can,focus on something for longer than a day or two.....

Just thinking out loud...

I have not posted in a while. It is summer and I try to keep busy around here since before you know it will be cold again.

I however was reading a post from one of the email forums I belong to. This one is Blind Talk of Il. I was reading a post from a mom of a blind girl. Her daughter has been blind for a year now, so blindness is all new for them. They are doing all the right things with the proper attitude. She wrote about going to a historical site with her son while her little girl was attending school. She heard one of the artist at the site mention that a class was being arranged for children 6 to 11 years of age. In this class they would learn to make molds of their hands. The mom thought her little girl would probably enjoy this activity so she inquired about it. She happened to mention her daughter was blind, and instantly the artist said, "Well, your son is welcome to the class, but it is too dangerous for a blind child." Well, mom was not happy,, but she did not want to make a scene. She has no interest in either of her children attending this class, but she wanted to vent on this forum and she asked what would we have done and what response would have been appropriate.

Well, I think she did right by not making a scene and upsetting her little boy. it does show however how much ignorance there is out in the world about the blind.

I am not saying people are ignorant in general. I am saying when it comes to understanding what blindness is and is not, many are ignorant, or shall we say 'In the Dark.' I am open to freely helping anyone who cares enough or is just curious to understand what a blind person, young or old, can and cannot do. In simple terms, we can do just about anything a person of our age in the "normal" world can do. In some cases we can do more and some we can only do our best. But, is that not the case for "normal" adults and children? It is not realistic to expect everyone to be able to be as successful or as good, if you will, as his or her counterpart. We are just normal people who can't see with our eyes. however
we are very able and capable to accomplish just about anything we set our minds to.. Yes I agree that their are some blind folk who aren't able to, or just don't want to do much of anything, but isn't that the same with many normal folk with no impairments? If you are reading this, please don't assume a blind person can or can't do something just based on the fact they are blind. There are many other factors to consider.

Really Upset...

I figured the best way to deal with how I feel is to write about it. What I am really upset about is how that little boy in New York lost his life. An 8 year old little boy walking home for the very first time gets lost and trust a friendly adult only to be murdered by this animal. It is horrible! The parents will blame themselves for the rest of their lives. It is so sad, they had even walked the course with him so he would know how to get home. I am sure they were waiting for him with much excitement, being his first time on his own. Things like this should never happen, but they do. We as parents and grandparents need to be mindful that there are horrible people out there. I will also suggest that if we hear or see someone acting strangely or too friendly around a child, no matter who he or she is, we should act if we deem it necessary.. No, I am not saying we should be suspicious of everyone, but it pays to be cautious. We as current or past parents know that gutt feeling we get when something does not seem right. Go with that feeling! It is far better to be safe than to be sorry...

May God be with the parents of that family and with our children.